Category Archives: Uncategorized

“Until Christ be formed in You”


Well, for me it didn’t happen over night.  When I started out I was a rebelious teen sneaking out at night, getting drunk, stoned, hating my sister, experiementing with sex.

I pretty much took over the possition of my X step dad.  I’d come home from school, light up that cigerette, and turn Van Halen up as loud as I could.  The louder the better.  Why I liked it loud I don’t know….maybe because he did….maybe because in his heart I was the daughter he wanted that nobody else wanted….and I knew that.  He even called me “his daughter.”  I acted just like him too….the only “father” I ever knew , mistreating my sister because that is what he did.   I came home drunk one night with my guy friend Mike who was a long haired pot head but a nice long haired pot head who politely took all the blame whenI was so drunk I lit the cigerette from the wrong end….and I really thought I was smoking it.  And the days of “sun-in” and bleach blonde hair that was dry as hay….and a big attitude, so skinny from no food I was almost anorexic, and tanned, verry tanned.  So angry that all it took was for me to drop something to set me off cussing.  Extreamly withdrawn, no real friends except Mike…who probably would have made a good husband if he ever gave up pot, maybe even if he didn’t. ( I beat him at some board game….I don’t remember which one.)

My sister and I had *no* relationship.  My mother was always working and when she wasn’t she was in her room crying over the next guy she lost, and finally begging me, begging me to go to church with her.  I finally did, thinking there had to be something better than this.  I feel bad for my mom but it really wasn’t all her fault.  If my Grandpa wasn’t so abusive she would have had a better life.  “Provoke not your children to anger.”

I’m just now getting to know my sister.  Why does life have to be so difficult.  Most sisters are best friends be we are like Jacob and Esau.  Or in the Bible Rachel and Lea, me always the ugly one…the invisible one….the one who had no personality….no friends…and like Rachel, Rebecca was beautiful and well favored and I was just a lost “ugly” soul still in the “Oh my God what in the world is this” fase.

OK.  Life did not change for me overnight.  First I became a Baptist and after I went through their whole “Romans road to salvation” salvation plan and called on the lord they stopped there.  Didn’t explain repentance, why I needed to be baptised or anything…just the calling and believing part.  Knowing nothing and being extreamly trusting, I believed them….Until I went to youth camp and learned about Lordship salvation.

There is just a mess of religious nonsense out there you have to weed your way through and you can’t believe everything everybody tells you because most of the time they’ve been taught at some seminary what to believe.

I lived in doubts and depression for fifteen years, fearing the “rapture” never sure of anything and scared to death of dying.  But that depression is God’s call telling you there is something wrong.

Best way I moved on from there was after I was confronted by some people who told me about God’s commandments.  I was taught by the Baptists it was not necessary to obey God.  They were pretty convincing about it, but in my heart I knew something was wrong.  After studying with the Sabbath day keepers for about six months I realized I had been duped and was in agaony after that until I started setting aside a time….at least an hour…more like two for study and prayer.

One of my favorite passages that helped me is John 15.  It speaks of abiding in the vine (the branches).  If we dont stay connected with Jesus we can’t grow and we won’t be righteous.  You have to get His Words *in you* and you need to do it every day if you can.

When I started out I did this in the morning…after husband was off to work so about 6:30 am-9:00 am.  It was good.  After a little while maybe about six months I went to a local cell church and told of my new found faith….I unexpectedly ran right into QM, but I didn’t know who he was.  I was still extreamly shook up (or afraid) but at least I knew the Truth.

Eventually, that Truth delivered me from the depression of my younger years, but it also took leaving two abusive relationships.

Google the law written on the heart….Essential, important.  I asked God to write his law in my heart, and he did.  I started seeing progress after about six months.

I still have quite a temper, but its just that I learned to take up for myself.  In the past I kept quiet, let people throw rocks at me, run over me, abuse me.  The drinking and pot stopped when I moved in with my legal guardians….but only because they made me.  I needed structure.  I never thought I’d come this far….to actually be used by God to help his people.  But like I said…you never know what you casn do until you try.

Also, prayer.  A lot of prayer…probably not as much now as needed but maybe 30 min./day.

After a year there will be a significant difference.







winning the blood sugar battle AND the weight battle.


I have great news!  Since I’ve moved back to my moms I have dropped 17 pounds!  I started out at about 256 and I’m down to 239!  This is a tremendous hurdle for me as I couldn’t seem to get below the 240’s.  I’ll tell you how I did it.  Portion control.

After getting most of my teeth pulled and being fitted for a partial for both upper and lower jaws I learned to eat less.  As my mouth healed I kept with the eating less and learned to eat until it was enough, not until I was stuffed.  Also I dropped the heavy meal at night.  I only have a light snack before bed so I can take my medicine.  I don’t eat past 7:00pm.

Loosing the weight Has  also helped me to lower my blood sugar by 100 points!  Most of the time I don’t even have to give myself a shot at night.  I still haven’t been exercising and I need to get back into that, but one thing at a time.

I found that my body doesn’t *need*as much food as it did when I was younger.  I’m no longer chasing after toddlers or nursing a newborn.  I can do with a little less food.

I’ve decided to go for loosing another 20 pounds.  I went from a size 22\24 to a size 18.  Now I’m shooting for a size 16 as I drop another 20 pounds.  I know I can do this!

I’ve also ordered this new diet/exercise program called the 21 day fix by beachbody.  Im not planning to go on a diet I just needed a little boost for my will power.  It is a lifestyle change program that starts you out loosing a little weight in 21 days but you can stick with the program your whole life. It has different plans for caloric intake and you get to choose which plan you want to start with.  My friend who started the program has already loist 13 pounds and my Dad has lost about 70 pounds from using portion control.  It includes bowls to measure your food.  You don’t have to count calories or points.  Just measure your food in these bowls for each meal and it really is a decent amount of food.  Also included are a couple of exercise DVDs with numerous exercises. Well my package hasn’t come yet but it should be here today.  I ordered a package off Amazon for $72. and ordered a book by the same author for $25.99 off eBay.  The title of the book is Fixate 101 personal recipes to use with the 21 day fix portion control program.  The author of the book is Autumn Calabrese.  I hope you check it out.









Still going strong….an update


Hello people.  I moved recently and its difficult to get back on track after a move.  Im back at it again after moving in August.

Thankfuly, there is a workout room here with a real nice exercise bike.  What ive been doing is go for a short, one mile walk and follow up with two or three miles on the bike accompanied with three sets of the girl type pushups.  The reason I do girl pushups is because I weigh about 245 pounds and I think pushing up half that weight is pretty good and enough to make my arms good and sore the next day.  I plan on changing it up next time by working out with videos.  Mom has a bunch from the eighties and nineties I want to try.  Also I have some new ones from this decade.  Its nice to have a variety to choose from when you get tired of the same old workout routine.

Well ive lost about ten pounds now depending on which doctors office I visit.  At least im in the 240s and not the 250s now, which makes me feel good about myself.  But my focus is on blood sugar levels, not weight, but its always nice to get a little encouragement now and then.


Easy Spanish tortilla and life on the farm


IMG_20141123_131938IMG_20141123_131655First I’m going to show you where I live and then we’ll get to the tortilla.

This is our little cabin in the country and some of the scenary and animals.

My husband and our cat big tiger and our snouzer we affectionately call little guy and our mamma cat I call loveables.


She had kittens in July and we gave them all away except big tiger.

She had kittens in July and we gave them all away except big tiger.

A few more pics around the house..

Our workout equipment.

Our workout equipment.

Kelly already tilled up our garden spot for the spring.

Kelly already tilled up our garden spot for the spring.

Little guy

Little guy

More pics around the house….

Big tiger stretched out on the sofa.  He is already bigger than his mamma and he's only four months!

Big tiger stretched out on the sofa. He is already bigger than his mamma and he’s only four months!

Here's my little fiber nook where I do all my reading, knitting, crochet, dreaming.

Here’s my little fiber nook where I do all my reading, knitting, crochet, dreaming.

I’m a bit unorganized and messy. I probably clean out my corner once or twice a week but it always messes back up the next day…like it has a mind of its

And here is me, the new found health guru and fiber fanatic….

Me , the not so quiet quietwoman

Me , the not so quiet quietwoman

Well, this is enough for now. I’m about to run out of juice on my notebook so I will continue with the tortilla next post. Have a blast today!!!

Setting a new goal…


I have been loosing a little weight, maybe five pounds over the past six months, but it’s not enough.  At this rate it will take me ten years to loose the 100 pounds I need to to get rid of the diabetes.  What if my diabetes just takes over and consumes me before I reach my goal?  No, I have to try harder.

So Today is November the 19th and I will start today eating a 1700 calorie diet and I will exercise at least once a day. Some days I might exercise twice a day. The exercise alone , which started in April of this year, has caused me to loose the five pounds I’ve already lost. So, if I rev it up a little maybe I can speed things up a little. So my new goal is to eat a 1700 calorie diet every day for the next year, and loose sixty pounds. That would mean I would need to loose about five pounds a month. I WILL do this.

My current weight is 250 and if I loose 60 pounds that will put me at about 190. After I reach that goal I will set a new one.

I got inspired by another blogger who’s goal was to loose 100 pounds in a year. I thought I would make a goal of my own because so far I have made no goals and haven’t lost a whole lot either. My goal is achievable if I’m careful about what I eat.

If you want join in with me. I need all the support and encouragement I can get. So now I go look up the caloric content of the foods I regularly eat and some foods I should avoid.


just an update


I have tried three times to post this update but it keeps getting lost, so here goes round three.  I realized after a year and a half of having to increase my medication and insulin’s injections that I had to get off my rear and do something to improve my condition because I was facing dialasis in the near future.  I had heard from  a neighbor that her doctor told her she was going to die if she didn’t start exercising, so she started walking.

I didn’t expect to live another ten years if I didn’t do something myself also.  I started walking in April of 2014, and let me tell you it has made a world of difference!  Not only did it reduce my blood sugar by over 100 points but I also got to cut back on my medication!  At first I only walked a mile a day and have worked myself up to 2-4 miles a day.  I walk about a mile in the morning and do my major walking in the evening.  

I’ve also changed my diet;  no sugary sodas or cookies and candy to the minamum.  Also, we are eating more beans and dried peas plus more fresh fruit and vegetables.  

I feel so much better and have more energy!  I would reccamend walking and change of diet to anyone wanting to improve their health.