Hello world, and people out there both supportive and nonsupportive My name is Rhonda Jones and I am the mother of six children. The reason I started this blog is to interact with and even challenge ideas about the new accept your body movement. First, I would like to say that I am a full figured woman and I have been probably after the birth of my 4th child, 16 years ago. I am about 246 pounds and I’m 5’7″ tall. Not extreamly obese but getting there if I keep going how I am.
I was all for the “accept your body movement” for many years after going on a crazy diet for a month. I was eating maybe one half a tortilla for lunch with 1/4 cup full of beans and fasting on and off through the month to loose weight. I was married to a man who wouldn’t have it any other way than me looking how I did when we first got married (a size 12 or smaller). I was only 180 lbs. and I didn’t look so bad after having 5 children. Well, I got down to about 180 lbs. About that time (about 9 yrs. ago) I came across this book: Learning Curves living your life in full and with style by Michelle West. This was my first book I ever read on body image/body acceptance. And I loved the idea and the freedom that this introduced into my life! Well, sadly, my husband did NOT like my new ideas and he demanded that I loose even more weight. But I really didn’t want to put myself on starvation mode again. Then I got pregnant and put on about 50 more pounds! Soon after the delivery of my sixth child husband withdrew from me, and he started wanting a divorce . It put me through a nervous breakdown, I was hospitalized and put on medication . At the hospital I lost down to 190 but put it back on and then some and I am now 245 give or take.
Soon after our divorce I joined a size acceptance group and got encouragement to accept my size. While I agreed with most of what they said and I liked going to a place that didn’t “judge” you because of your size, I soon realized that while many of them seemingly *had* accepted themselves at their current size/weight there was an underlying lack of concern about their health, many times even denying that being so overweight/obese was even a danger to their health. I went a long with it for a while, but I could not get it out of my head that I wasn’t going to live that long if I didn’t *do something* to improve myself. I was off and on with this group over the past year. Then something unexpected happened….
I went to the doctor to have some ordinary blood tests done and found out I had high blood sugar, elevated cholesterol, elevated triglycerides. They put me on medication immediatly to get my triglycerides and cholesterol down and combat what was obvious signs of diabetes. That was last October of 2012. Just recently they have diagnosed me with diabetes. All ready I have had numbness and tingling in my fingertips and wounds heal alot slower. I don’t want this disease!!! While I am totaly against going on another diet (because as many of you know diets don’t work) I know I *need* to do something. In may I was diagnosed with full fledged diabetes. At age 45! Me? with diabetes? I didn’t do much from October to May , still stuck in the mindset that I should “just accept my body”. Well, it’s not a sin to care about your health.
Loving your body also means taking care of yourself, your temple that God has given you, even if it means excercising and having the proper diet, which some have totaly aboned on the above mentioned group. And they have the attitude that it’s none of anybody’s business what they eat and how much they eat and what they weigh, all at their loved one’s expense because they are the ones who will enevitably have to take care of them when they can no longer walk.
I’m currently looking for a lifestyle change, one that I can follow for life and not just a couple of weeks until I loose X amount of weight. My focus is on health, not weight loss, even though I wouln’t mind loosing about 100 pounds. My new husband has been trying to encourage me to loose weight/get some excercise. When we first married we lifted weights together. I have started walking for 30 min. in the morning. Not much but it’s a start. I’m going to see a diatician and a doctor maybe of natural medicine to help me come up with a food plan that I can loose weight with.
The sad thing is that while I reported to above group that I did not want to accept the diagnosis, that I was going to *do something* to improve my health they all accused me of negligence. They have settled into their little ruts and *no one* seems to want to change their current situation or do a thing to improve themselves. They are negative towards change and improvement and possitive about accepting their bodies, some of them over 400 lbs. without the slightest hint of concern for their health. I want to be a part of a group that cares about themselves, and that would include their bodies too. I don’t want to be a part of a group that has these self defeating attitudes about themselves, “well even if I do loose weight I’ll just gain it right back.” so they don’t even try because they have already defeated themselves before they even begin. I’m *NOT* going to give up like they have. I’m going to *do* something about my health, my body, and my life.